“Is my foot broken or have I just been standing too long?” (A.K.A having a physical job and autoimmune issues)
Today, I woke up feeling like I had been hit by a truck. Stiff, groggy, feet are numb like they’ve fallen asleep- and when I swing my legs over the bed to the floor and stand up, it’s like walking on pins and needles for a few seconds.
Yesterday was a long day. The market started at 8, so I needed to be there at 7 at the latest, to set up. I live thirty minutes from the market, so I have to leave my house by 6:30, which means I have to start Tetris packing everything in the car by 6am.
This all means a 4:30 wake up time, because mornings have to be slow for me. My body doesn’t jump out of bed and shower and get dressed in half an hour before I leave. I need to drink coffee and stare for about thirty minutes, while I sit at my desk and use my foot and leg massager machine (two cycles is half an hour).
Once I get a little more awake, I put my face in a hot towel (and sigh), rub the sleep out of my eyes, and pop in my contacts. I don’t eat breakfast on Saturday markets because it is so hectic, it’s just easier to do my weekly 24 hour fast on this day. I typically eat 4pm dinner Friday night and then break the fast at 4pm after the market. I don’t do this for weight loss (because that’s not happening), but mostly because my gut enjoys the break. (Plus it’s always too nuts to eat at the market- I barely even sit down).
If I’ve prepped everything correctly, the night before, now is the time I do about 10 minutes of yoga. It’s not good yoga, it’s super stiff joints yoga, but I’m doing it anyway. Trying to keep my mobility has been a part time job and my rheumatologist lets me know that I’m very mobile compared to every other patient (but in a sarcastic way- as if I don’t need to be there). Once, I apologized for attempting to maintain my mobility by doing yoga for thirty years (also sarcastic- back at ya). I’ve made it very clear that I do not like the side effects of medications, so I prefer not to be on any until absolutely necessary- and doctors don’t usually love that (they are problem solvers).
Anyway, now I get dressed and finally head out to the market where I will take my hour of prep to set up the canopy, tables, and bakery items. Then, I’ll stand for 99% of the five hour market (why did I bother to buy a chair?). Next, I will pack everything back into my car and head home, where I will unpack (hopefully) just empty tubs in my storage sunroom. Is my day over now? Nope.
I usually get home around 2:15 but it’s not time to break the fast, so I don’t want to sit down yet. If you sit down, you’re toast. So instead I make a list of items I need to slice, frost, bake, and package for my Sunday market. And then I get started.
When I look up again, it’s 6pm and I need to eat something, so I sit. Bad move, I never want to get up again. But, I have a couple of hours of packaging left to do. I’m sick of the playlist that’s been running through my headphones for hours, but I’m too exhausted to focus on tv, even banal reality tv, so I keep the headphones on.
I work as fast as I can, because now I’m really beat and I want to LAY not sit. When I finish, I shower the day out of my hair (I cannot go to bed smelling the outdoors and grass pollens on my pillow), and I collapse. I lay on a heating pad every night under my lower back to help relax those muscles so I can fall to sleep. I rub Voltaren gel all over my legs and hope it heals me (it doesn’t.)
I tend to sleep too long in positions and frequently wake up with a numb hand or stiff shoulder. But the bonus part is that my general fatigue level, combined with a standing-scooping-heaving 50lb bags-folding boxes-carrying heavy trays-deadlifting whatever FedEx left on the porch-job helps me sleep pretty easily.
Still, I wake up and the soreness has caught itself up too. So, as the busy seasons roll through bakeries, the mornings get earlier and slower, so my body can catch up to its normal. Sometimes I work all day and the nerves in one leg have decided to hate everything, so I’m at the market with shooting pains in my shin or toes or hips. Ice helps when I get home but I just grin and bear it for the most part. I know my body will give out eventually, but I’m not going down without a fight.
My love of baking is giving me more victories than defeats, so far. I’ll try to keep that going as long as I can.
